Friday, April 1, 2011

I've got good news, and bad news.
Good news first: Cheska's no longer in danger of being killed by Big Blue or a proxy.
Bad news: It's because she's my new right-hand girl. Well, actually, that's just bad news for you guys, I think. It's excellent news for me.

Cheska woke up tied down to a chair, with an IV plugged into her right forearm via needle. I made sure to wipe up any blood and I numbed that spot so she only felt minimal pain. I also made sure the first thing she saw was me.
“... Isabel?” she asked, groggy from whatever had knocked her out when some dude in a mask dumped her in the chair earlier that first day. Yes, first. She held out for two days. “What... where am I?” I tipped my hat to her,
“Glad to see a friendly face, kitten?" I asked, lounging back on the chair opposite her. Cheska just gave me a cold stare.
“What the hell is going on here, Fizzy?" A fair question. I decided she deserved to hear my take on things. Well, okay, I'll give her a choice. The way this drug works, it'll get harder for her to think the more brain activity goes on. From what the science types told me about it, it moves through the brain faster that way. I don't know, I'm not a fucking biologist.
"Well, do you want the answer that'll let you feel relieved, or do you want the answer that'll make you realize you're bound into a chair in the middle of nowhere with a powerful hypnotic drug dripping into your bloodstream?" I swept my hand around, and I could tell she was only then coming to realize we were in an abandoned airplane hangar.
“I'd prefer knowing why one of my old friends isn't dead, if you please."
"Alright, another choice, though pretty soon your poor head's gonna start feeling really foggy. Do you want the long version, or do you want the short one?”

She asked for the long version. I obliged. I told her everything about how I ended up like this. Something like pity dawned in her eyes. I told her about how I'd been ordered to kill her. That pity crumbled. I held up a finger, and started in on the real meat of the plan. I leaned against the back of her chair and hugged her from behind, telling her how I felt. I considered, and continue to consider her, a dear friend, and how if she stayed with me, she'll be safe. You know, from Big Blue, and his other merry henchmen. I explained why I stopped caring about most people—hell, look at the people who are being haunted these days. People who want to meth lab a cure, people who want to treat this like the sequel to The Expendables... Well, you get the gist of it. The people making the same mistakes I did, only, they're not learning from them.
“He loved you, you know. You were family to him. His cool big sister.” How do I explain what went on in that hangar to you all? Big Blue was there, you know. If I didn't get her to see things my way, I had to kill her. If I didn't do either, he'd kill her, then kill me. And I'm still not ready to die, and I can't stand to let Cheska get hurt if I can prevent it. And that's what I told her. I made sure the computer was still recording, and I spent hours talking to her in a soft, soothing voice. Reassuring her, as the drug kicked in full-force and Cheska started having trouble telling my words apart from her thoughts, that I was going to keep her safe from everything that would hurt her, I stood behind her and lightly massaged her temples.

Yes, yes, I know, some or all of you are gasping right now, pointing at me and calling me a bounder, a cad, a villain for brainwashing her. Here's the thing: I didn't use anything but that drug, and techniques you learn in a first-year psychology course. I kept appealing to the part of her that wanted to be protected and loved, and touched her in relaxing, reassuring ways. If she wanted, she could have fought it off long enough to pull the IV out of her arm, especially since I unbound her and re-bound only her wrists and ankles once she went limp, and her denials turned into soft, curious questions, and finally, acceptance. I held her there like that, for... I don't know how long. I'd long since pulled the IV out. She fell asleep smiling and snuggling up against me. I used the computer to edit the recording, replace all her denials early on with acceptance, cut out the extraneous parts, and put it on an endless loop after donning some earplugs. I wasn't tired, so I stayed up all night, hugging her close, listening to her start to whisper along with my played-back voice.

It was around noon when she woke up, so I stopped the recording and pulled the earplugs out. Big Blue wasn't near anymore. I didn't feel that tug in my head. Cheska just fixed her soft blue eyes on me and asked, in a heartbreakingly innocent tone, “What now?” I sighed. Now to see if she was going to be saved, or if I'd have to bury that last bit of me that's still sane and decent.
“Well... we're going to have to do some very bad things to some good people, Chessie,” I began. She knew exactly what I meant. I wasn't surprised, she's always been bright.
“Why can't we help them?”
“We... are, in a way. They won't be scared, they won't be hurt, they'll be free, Chessie. I promise, we'll make sure it doesn't hurt when we catch up to one and they'll be given a proper burial.” I looked at her, eye-to-eye, and cradled her cheek in my hand, “Trust me.” Cheska waged a short inner war, then nodded, resting against me, and before she fell asleep (putting us in our current situation), she managed to slurr out,
“I trust you.”

So, before anyone thinks about playing the hero, I need you to stop and really think. I can keep her safe from Big Blue, and the other proxies. I can make sure she's never hurt, that she's safe, protected, and loved. I can give her a *life.* Would you rather tear her away from that, leave her alone and terrified in a hostile world with an otherworldly creature hunting her down, leaving her dead in a ditch somewhere after spending the last days of her life terrified, lonely, hurting, and with her sanity in shreds?

47 comments:

  1. ....

    It's not a "life" you're giving her, Fizzbomb. It just seems like one.

    That said, I'm in no position to do something about it even if I wanted to, so why argue?

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  2. Obviously what's happening is better than what you've outlined here, but it's a hell of a lot worse than, yes, a real life, a free life, free from all of this.

    I dunno. I'd rather be dead than in her place.

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  3. Well, Frappuccino, a life away from all this isn't really possible. If I could've given her that, I would've, but there's no reset button so I gave her the next best thing.

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  4. Happy April Fools' Day!

    Get it together, Fizzy; we don't need another Fallen.

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  5. GAH! My name is NOT Frappuccino.

    ...Although they are delicious.

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  6. You know, I've never really been fond of April Fools' jokes, JF. Sorry to say, mate.

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  7. Don't kid yourself, Fizz. I don't care if this gets another outburst from Jean, but you haven't saved Cheska. You've just bought her some time. Sooner or later, Slender Man will decide it'll be fun to screw with her again, and her last days will be spent terrified, lonely, hurting, and her sanity in shreds, one way or another at this rate.

    You said we're on a rollercoaster to Hell before. Well, you're helping to strap someone in for the ride. If you don't know that, even if you've buried that fact deep down inside, then you're as deluded as Zero.

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  8. Wow. I take my apology back.

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  9. Leaf, even if that's true, it's still better than what she'd have to put up with alone.

    Ron: To which I respond with a resounding, meh.

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  10. Yes, just keep telling yourself that and you might actually start to believe it. We both know there is no "even if that's true". It is.

    He will never be far away from her now. He'll be closer than ever. You have not saved her from anything, especially not from facing the end alone. At the first excuse He has, this little arrangement of yours' will be end in blood and tears. She will still face His Hell alone. So congratulations for prolonging the inevitable.

    There are not words in any language to describe how poor of a decision you have made. As someone who served Him for ten years before recently defecting, I know. I've seen situations like this play out almost word for word over the years. The person in Cheska's position never once came out ahead.

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  11. Lets see, leaving her alone and terrified with her sanity in shreds, hunted by an otherworldly creature for the rest of her short life...

    Welcome to my world. I made that choice. Lord knows that for all the fun I've had in New Jersey, I'll have to start running soon. Cheska made that choice too. All you did was take the choice away from her. I may be nuts, but I'll get to die in a place of my choosing. On my own terms. Anything less would be maddening.

    Of course, you know what that's like, don't you Fizzy? You should have stayed dead. This must be the purest form of hell for someone like you. Unable to die on your own terms, doomed to live in servitude to something like this. You're so busy trying to convince us of the truth you proclaim, because it's your way of reinforcing it for yourself. It's your way of saying, "This is the way it has to be, because it's all I'll ever have."

    Bask in the pain of your own weakness. And leave Cheska out of it. Just because you can't die with honor doesn't mean you should make her live a life of regret.

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  12. I concur. You can't do this to Cheska, Fizz.
    The Black King will not hold up His end of the bargain. You have to know that.
    If you ever cared about Cheska, at all, you will send her far away at the earliest opportunity.

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  13. Cheska doesn't have to be alone. I'm with two others. She just needs to find help.

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  14. I don't really know what to say.

    Vivi and Chester...you were their friend. They spoke highly of you. Cheska, too. And Jeff. I know that it would break their hearts to see you and Cheska like this.

    That aside, you come anywhere near them with any intent to harm them and I will kill you.

    --Stella

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  15. I second what Vieve said. Come anywhere near Pete or Ron, and I will end you, Fizz.

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  16. Heavy move, Fizz. Give her my best. And tell me, can you live up to the responsibility?

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  17. It's almost a little weird to see Unc during his "down time" and here how everybody else describes him. Then again he is the type of guy to torture and threaten his own spawn.

    Well you and Cheska have my best wishes until the inevitable betrayl.

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  18. Fizz, are you sure that you can take the responsibility of another person? I have to agree with Maduin there.

    Anyway, give Cheska my best.

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  19. Ava, Maduin: Will do, and you're gonna have to trust me on this one.
    Hellfire (catchy, by the way): Downtime, huh? For some reason, I get the mental image of him sipping some coffee and reading the Sunday paper when I hear 'downtime.' I wonder if he's a recliner or kitchen table kind of guy when it comes to the paper.

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  20. So you're not going to listen. Fine. When the time comes, and it will, you won't be able to say I didn't warn you.

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  21. Let's be honest here, when's the last time I've *ever* taken advice? It'd be terribly out of character for me.

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  22. I wouldn't know. You deleted your older entries, which I never read. I only ever read the blogs belonging to Sages or those of immediate interest to the affairs in Boston, in my time in His services. I only arrived here when others made a big deal out of your return. I was curious as to why. You disappoint.

    Don't sound so smart when brushing off advice, Little Miss Slave To His Whims. Terribly out of character or not, doing things by your numbers has ended you up in the ultimate pickle and you are dragging another down with you. To be frank, you look like an idiot right now. Fine. Have it your way, since it is obvious that you will only have it your way. When this deal you made with the devil goes under, I will be there to say to a humbled Fizz that "I told you so."

    I have no "good lucks", "well wishes", or "Godspeeds" to give, because you damn yourself and another at this point.

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  23. Just what convinces you that this will save Cheska, Fizz, anyway? This IS 'Big Blue' we're dealing with here, you know?

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  24. Leaf: Eh, fair enough. What happens happens.
    Pete: The fact that the only henchmen of his he's offed are ones with an exceptionally bad record for following orders and ones that decide to re-join the side that's consistently lost for however long he's been around (otherwise, he wouldn't be around, dig?) is a pretty good indication.

    As of now, the only thing I have to worry about are the people I'm being sent around to gank, and let's be honest here, other than Cheska, they're nobodies who wouldn't be picked out of a lineup of one. Makes sense, I guess. Why would you send the new girl with a history of defiant behavior after a high-profile target?

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  25. She doesn't. That The Black King only kills traitors or disobient servants is a complete fabrication. I've seen Him break deals on whim and without provocation many times.

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  26. Leaf: You ought to let Thage know that he randomly breaks deals, then, 'cause sounds like he observed that deal she cut for a pretty good chunk of time 'til she broke it herself.

    So, tell ya what. Show me solid, irrefutable proof he breaks deals, 'cause I haven't seen hair or hide of anything like that, either from first-person experience or recorded encounters. Otherwise, I really don't have a very good reason to take your word over his, especially where my and my friend's survival is concerned.

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  27. Ha, what? You think Slender Man makes deals? You think he even understands such human concepts? You think they even concern him? Proxies make deals, Slender Man doesn't make deals, he simply does. Stop talking out your hole, Leaf.

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  28. Oh shit, how've you been, Reach?

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  29. I'm not, Reach. That's exactly the point I'm trying to make. Any agreement attempted with Him will end when He fancies it.
    Wait. You're seriously going to believe anything The Black King tells you? I don't have any evidence other than what I've witnessed, first hand. What I have is an abomination that should not exist and does not play by any human rules.
    Oh, yes. Thage's deal. Well, Reach turned out not to actually be in hs fifties, remember? So how can we even be sure that her deal hasn't been some kind of fabrication as well? The point is, you can't trust anything concerning The Black King. He plays by His own rules, and does as He wishes when He wishes how He wishes.
    Fine. If you won't believe me, then go ahead.

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  30. Oh, step off, Reach. He wasn't bullshitting anyone. His point was that Slender Man won't hold Its end of any bargain, period.

    Taking Slender Man's word for anything more than a grain of nothingness... Yeah, [sarcasm]that'll land you places.[/sarcasm]

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  31. You're going to trust Slender Man, and trust It over Leaf? Not only are you stubborn, but you're also stupid. This thing... This entity, is a vile abomination that, as I believe you said, "shouldn't exit".
    It's one thing to be It's unwilling servant, but you actually believe It's word?! You know, being called "retarded" by you now seems hilarious.

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  32. Um, Leaf, I'm pretty sure you're the one who said Fizz had a deal, not Fizz.

    And I've been fine, Fizz. How are you and Cheska?

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  33. If there's another word for what's happened her, then tell me. Cheska joins Fizz and in exchange they both live. That's a deal if I ever saw one. My point from the beginning is that He will not go along with this forever and will go about His work on them both.

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  34. Pete: It's a matter of pragmatism. Every battle that's been carried on against Big Blue, he's won. If nothing else, my survival instinct is smart enough to know that when David gets crushed by Goliath, you chill with Goliath and not David's upset little brother.

    Reach: Good. Cheska's got a hell of a ground game when it comes to hand-to-hand, though.

    Leaf: It's like I said. What will happen, will happen.

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  35. It wasn't a trade, for fuck's sake. It's a simple matter of "Slender Man is less likely to break someone if they are one of his tools". Slender Man didn't agree, there wasn't some meeting in a fucking board room where they signed a fucking contract. Fizz broke her, Fizz turned her, Fizz is keeping her alive. Christ, if you're not going to put a brain in the space between your ears, at least rent it out to a homeless guy or something.

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  36. I hear M might be looking for some new digs, Reach.

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  37. Oh Fizz. I laughed. I laughed so hard.

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  38. Keep telling yourself that. The fact is I don't entirely believe it went down exactly as Fizz claims it did.

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  39. I think your distrust in Fizz's word might be misplaced, Leaf.

    @ Fizz: So that's it, then? So should the rest of us just give up and join It as well?

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  40. I'll be damned before I side with the monster that killed my friends.

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  41. I'm not gonna tell you guys how to run things. I'm just telling you how things look to me. If you guys are right, awesome, it works for you. If not, well, che sarà, sarà.

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  42. Yes, you will be, Ron. I think that's Fizz's point.

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  43. My distrust is not misplaced, Pete.

    2004:
    Proxy #1 attempts the very same thing Fizz claims to have done.
    The Black King STILL rips the intended target to shreds. So no, I don't believe her.

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  44. No, Ron, I'm already damned, we all are, and if you think otherwise, you're a fool.

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  45. I never said otherwise. Quit being so quick to insult.
    I will never give up on un-damning myself, though. Never.

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